About Me

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I am going to be the one that will change many lives, will make a difference, and will inspire others like my life was inspired by others♥ I want to change the way people cannot get help for drug/alcohol addiction the way we should be able to get help, I want to change the way addicts think, get into the mind of an addict, and HELP them Married, and a mommy to 1.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Trike Mike's Story (Guest Post)


Trike Mike e-mailed me wanting to share his story. I am so glad he did. What an awesome guy he is. I have never met him but he reminds me of those bikers that are really hardcore but in reality that are huge teddy bears. I enjoyed sitting here reading his story, and e-mailing back and fourth with him. 
TRIKE MIKE’S
JOURNEY

As most of us, I had lived decades in a blur of alcohol and drugs. After years of extreme abuse, I decided to grow up and be a "responsible adult" and stick to drinking. Coming from generations of alcoholics and addicts, I had sworn that I would not follow that pattern. Although I always continued to push myself to expand my knowledge, career, material items, etc.; in a manner that many of us are taught to be the "American dream", I reached my thirties in a blur with a large emptiness inside me that nothing material could fill.

Many of times over the years I tried to reach a better understand and relationship with a GOD of my understanding or of someone's understanding at the least. From church to church I went over the years, sometimes feeling great strength from it, but always returning to my addiction after Sunday service ended. After a few rough patches in my life including the death of my wife's sister from cancer, the death of my own sister from overdose just a few months later, and the incarceration of my brother due to addiction for a period of nearly 20 years; I eventually walked completely away from GOD  and began to rely strictly on my work and my whiskey.


Through the years I had many low spots, at one point I was homeless, but that wasn't enough for me to see what I was doing to myself. By Thirty-one, I was divorced from a rather abusive marriage and had full custody of my two beautiful girls, living in a new city, and drinking like a fish. After a few failed relationships I met a beautiful woman, that was prefect for me and my children and we all continued to succeed, but I continued to sink inside. With my career where I wanted it; actually more than I ever expected, my children doing great, and an incredible relationship, I still continued to sink.

The last six months of my drinking I so wanted to stop, but could not do it even for a day. At this point I was hiding bottles in the garage and having a couple extra drinks before anyone was home, so I didn't have to counts those that night. I'd wake in the morning telling myself, "you can't drink tonight", but by midday I was watching the clock for five pm.
My love of motorcycles has been my escape for years, and I had one long standing personal rule to never drink and ride. Towards the end I broke that rule and it scared me. August, 12th 2010, I was sitting in the garage surfing the net on my phone and found a site for a recovery based motorcycle club called New Attitudes. After pouring yet another Crown and Coke, I found a flyer on their site for an upcoming sober event and at the bottom it listed a name and a phone number in Saginaw, Michigan, "for further information call Dan." So after finishing my drink and pouring another I got the courage to call this stranger. Dan "Squeeze", talked to be for a couple of hours, mostly listening to me whine about my stated of hopelessness, but his strongest input was giving me the courage to contact someone locally. The next day I admitted my addiction to a female coworker that was married to a member of New Attitudes MC, within an hour Darren "Dagwood" called and invited me to lunch at the New Attitude Recovery House for lunch. I was greeted by five hardcore bikers, hardcore in the recovery and hardcore in their biking life, strange thought huh?! But here's a group of men that have chosen to do what they love to do, Bike and have fun, but do it while living a sober life and spreading a message of hope.

After a couple of hours of talking to these men, it was apparent we had many differences, but many  more similarities in our lives. Most of the time I was deeply engulfed in they stories that got them to where they were in life, but then they brought up the word I feared the most "Spiritual". I had to grip the counter to keep from running, but I was enticed at what they had to offer. That weekend, as all weekends, the Recovery House was open to the public, for a place to hang out, eat, play, and drink coffee and soda.

I was standing out by the fire listening to a New Attitudes MC member named Blackman, tell a story of his journey through the fifth step. He started speaking of a hard-nosed woman that spoke through a vocal box due to throat cancer. He had asked her, "what if I want a drink?", she replied, "drink a milkshake". He asked, what if I still want a drink?" She replied, "Drink another milk shake". He then asked, "what if I still want a drink?" She strongly replies, "Your not getting it! You Drink Milkshakes till your sick if need be!" The group listening to his story of course then chuckled and he says, "Good old Neva G". I almost fell to the ground, but I asked, "Neva G?" He said, "Yeah you heard of her?" I responded, "Yeah she's my grandmother." Neva had been dead for years, but here I am, 120 miles from where I grew up, trying to take a look at this sobriety stuff, and I get a slap in the face the first night.

I left quickly after, almost in tears and when I got home I called Blackman and told him, "you kinda freaked me out and I was trying to wrap my head around this." He said, "well, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out, but maybe its Ol' Neva G, trying to tell you you are where you need to be, we both know she was good at that." At that point I new I had found my new home.

I still fought for months to find a connection to a high power, going to many churches and talking to many in the fellowship to gain insight, I felt lost, but I kept working with a sponsor, going to many meetings a week, and spending a lot of time on my knees asking for guidance and serenity. It was a scary road with many bumps, twists, and turns, but when I wanted to drink during the hard times I would play out the results of those drinks in my head and always come to the realization that I would still have to face the issue and would most likely have made it worse.

It took me months to get a solid hold on my recovery and life balance, but I never gave up the faith in the tables and those around me. It took me some time, but I realized my HP's plan. I remember early on saying in a meeting, "This sobriety thing is a bitch!" but after some severe hardships in my first few months, I realized I was sober now for a reason, to be the rock for those that have been there for me in my life. Each hardship got a little easier, because getting through them sober and being able to be there for others, deepened my faith and gave me strength and hope that I never thought possible. I know now my life has a purpose and that is to live My Life His Way. Be there to help others which in turn helps me.

Now I am coming up on two years clean and although they have been difficult years on life's terms, I cannot imagine living it any other way. I also know that from now till forever I must keep doing what I doing. Reach out to others, go to meetings, give power to my faith, and never stop trying to do the next right thing. I know this is the only way, because I have seen the alternative close to home. My father with nearly 23 years of sobriety get comfortable and quit working a program and now has 3 years clean. Even after decades, we all still suffer from the disease.


I have buried a sister and lost a brother to prison till 2024 to drugs and alcohol, yet I was spared. I have since completed my Bachelors' and I'm working on my Masters' and I'm living for today. My Higher Power tests me often, but if I am willing to trust and I am willing to communicate to those around me, I will continue to be helpful to others. I and many others travel the country holding events to support recovery and enjoy a biker's lifestyle. 
Remember if you reach just one individual, you have made a diiference.
Today I am blessed. Tomorrow is in His hands.
Thank you



I hope you have enjoyed Trike Mike's story as much as I did. My favorite part was the part about his Grandma and the milkshakes. <3 Congratulations on 2 years sober, and keep doing what your doing because it's WORKING!!

Until Next Time....

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